Wedding Dress Shopping 101
So you're finally ready to start looking for a wedding dress! You might be excited. You might be nervous. You might not even know how to feel. One thing is for sure though: you have a lot of questions. Shopping for a wedding dress is unlike any other shopping you've ever done, and you might not have a clue how to go about it.
Today's article will hopefully put your mind at ease a little. I am going to cover what you should bring, what you should wear, and what you need to know. Ready?
What to Bring
You may not even realize that you need to bring anything with you, but here are a few helpful pointers...
1. Inspiration Pictures
It will help your bridal consultant a lot if you come prepared with pictures of some of your favorite dresses. You can cut them out of magazines, save them to your phone, or even make a Pinterest board dedicated to your favorite dresses. As long as you have something to show her, it doesn't matter how you do it! (Check out my Pinterest board of Wedding Dresses for inspiration!)
2. Shoes, Veil, Jewelry, etc. (if you already have any of it)
You may not actually have this stuff before you go dress shopping, but if you do have it, bring it with you! If you already know which shoes you plan to wear, having them with you when you do find "the one" will make it so much easier. Your bridal consultant will be able to measure you for your dress with the exact shoes so she can get the length right (some dresses come in custom length!). If you have always dreamed of wearing your mom's veil, bring it with you so you can try it on with all of the beautiful dresses! You want to make sure it coordinates with your dress. Do you have Grandma's necklace that you can't imagine getting married without? Having it with you will ensure you find the perfect neckline for that necklace!
3. Water!
You'd be amazed how tiring and dehydrating dress shopping can actually be! Say your appointment is an hour long--maybe you'll try on 10 dresses in that hour. Did you know that some of those dresses can weigh as much as 25 pounds?! And you are going to walk around in them as well as walk around the store looking for dresses to try on. It's like a work out! Bring a refillable water bottle.
What to Wear
This one gets asked a lot. Most people have no idea what they should wear when they go try on wedding dresses. The main thing I try to tell people is to make sure that you keep in mind that you might be changing in front of the bridal consultant. Also keep in mind, they do this every day, so they have seen everything; but if you're not comfortable, that's not good either.
1. Nude, Strapless or Sticky Bra
Nothing ruins the look of a wedding dress worse than hot pink or black bra straps staring you in the face. Ideally, wear a sticky bra if you can because so many dresses have such amazing back detail and your bra band might break up the beauty and distract. I realize we can't all wear those sticky bras so I highly recommend a nude, strapless bra as the next best choice. At least if the band is nude, it will be less noticeable. Either way, I do recommend you wear a bra. I know some people don't wear one at all, since wedding dresses usually have built-in pads already. Two things wrong with that, though. One, some of the dresses actually don't have pads. Two, how many people tried that on before you?? Yuck. Also, most dresses will look better if you have some support.
2. Spanx or Nude Underwear
If you're self conscious about changing in front of the consultant, wear some boy shorts or Spanx (just make sure they aren't too high-cut because they could show with low back dresses! I recommend these). Just make sure they are nude because surprisingly you can see colored underwear through some of the dresses. If you are comfortable wearing a no-seam thong in front of your consultant, this would be the best option, as you are guaranteed that it won't show through any dress (even that body-clinging silk number). This is not the day to wear your hot pink polka dot panties!
3. Consider Your Hair and Makeup
Some people like to have their hair and/or makeup similar to how they will have it on the day of their wedding. I'm not saying go get your hair and makeup done before you try on dresses. If you are going to wear your hair up on your wedding day, wear it up when you try on dresses; if you are going to wear your hair down on your wedding day, wear it down. Same with makeup--if you know you want to do a smokey eye for the wedding, do a smokey eye, etc.
Other people like to wear their hair up no matter what for trying on dresses just so their hair is out of the way and they can see all the detail on all the dresses a little better. Some bridal shops prefer you not wear makeup at all because it can wipe off on the dresses. Personally, I would never go try on a stunning beaded gown with no makeup on. Not because I have to wear makeup 24/7 but because there would be such a disconnect, I wouldn't be able to picture myself all done up in the gown. Personally, I think you'll be fine wearing makeup, as long as you are careful about it. You step into most dresses anyway.
What to Know
There are so many questions you might have besides the standard "what should I bring, what should I wear." There are so many things I wish I had known before I went wedding dress shopping for the first time. Here are some of the things I learned to help you out!
1. You Will Change in Front of Someone
Just to continue to drive this point home, your consultant will be helping you put on and take off dresses. They have seen it all--I can tell you I know people that have gone dress shopping in their birthday suit. I promise you. This is their job. They see people in this situation on a daily basis, so there is no reason to be uncomfortable. Just keep it in mind when you decide on your undergarments for the day so that YOU are comfortable too.
2. Wedding Dresses Take Forever to Come in
This is not the case for all dresses. This is not the case for off-the-rack dresses. Some designers are faster than other designers. However, the general rule of thumb is that wedding dresses CAN take 6-8 MONTHS to come in. Start shopping early. It's better to have your dress come in too early than too late.
3. Careful Who You Bring
If you've seen "Say Yes to the Dress" you know what I'm talking about here. However, they don't really explain it well enough. If you ask me, it's actually not about the NUMBER of people you bring with you, it's about the TYPE of people you bring with you. My first dress appointment, I wanted everyone involved. I brought 8 people with me. That would be "frowned on" normally. However, all of the people that I brought were nothing but supportive. We all had a great time, and no one butted heads. They all had the right attitude. I think if you only bring 3 people with you but 2 of them are very loud, opinionated people, that's a lot worse than bringing 8 super supportive people. It's a good idea to check with the shop ahead of time--some of them actually have a limit on the number of people you can bring! Also, you've probably seen this on "Say Yes to the Dress," but before you bring your fiance, your dad, etc., consider the other girls who will be trying on dresses that day. They all walk around the store in dresses that don't fit and there can be "wardrobe malfunctions" involved in that, as well as very frank discussions of fit, etc.
4. You Need an Appointment
You do need to have an appointment to try on wedding dresses. Even if the store says they take walk-ins, do yourself a favor and make an appointment. What happens when you "walk-in" is that the consultant might have 1-3 other brides that she's helping at that moment and start helping you at the same time. It can seriously be chaos. You are more likely to get one-on-one attention (or at most, she might have one other bride at the same time) if you make an appointment ahead of time.
5. You Will Likely Need Alterations
You want your wedding dress to fit like a glove, like all the girls in magazines and on Pinterest. I have to be honest with you--finding a dress that fits like a glove is SUPER unlikely. You will probably have to have alterations. Keep that in mind when you budget for your wedding dress. Alterations can range from very inexpensive up to hundreds of dollars. Some dress shops will have a resident seamstress or can recommend a seamstress, but you don't have to use that person. It can be more convenient to treat it as a one-stop shop, but if the shop isn't in your town, it can be easier to use a seamstress closer to home. Plus, it's often less expensive.
6. You Probably Won't Have to Pay for it All That Day
Most bridal shops do payment plans. The most common that I've seen is that you pay half down when you place the order and half when it comes in. Usually, the only time you would have to pay all at once is if you get a dress off-the-rack. Call ahead of time and ask the shop what their payment plan is.
7. Don't Try to do More than 2 Shops in a Day
Wedding dress shopping wears you out. Don't try to do 3-4 shops in one day, even if you think "I run marathons, I won't get worn out." Maybe you really wouldn't. However, after a few shops the dresses will all start to blend together in your mind and you will lose your focus. It's so much fun to make a day out of dress shopping. Instead of cramming tons of shops into one day, try planning one before lunch, having an awesome lunch with your girls, and then going to one more after lunch.
8. The Dresses in the Shop Are NOT Going to Fit You
99% of the time anyway. It doesn't matter what size you are. You will try on dresses that are too big and too small. I was surprised when I went dress shopping. I think I went to 10 shops. Out of all those shops, there was only ONE dress that ALMOST fit. None of the shops carry a size 2. But all shops don't just carry "sample sizes 6-8" or whatever either. The majority of the dresses I tried on were anywhere from an 8 (that was usually the smallest) to a 14. I tried on some 16's and 18's too! At that point I couldn't even tell what those dresses would actually look like on me (the dress I ordered was a size 0!). I even saw one sample dress that was a size 26. So, don't worry. Most places have a range of sizes, and no matter what size you are, none of them will fit perfectly (or at least almost none) and that is totally normal and totally okay!
Also, as a smaller-chested woman, I have to say that most shops will tell you the dresses all have a cup size B-C. In my experience, this was not true. The small sizes tended to have a B, but once you get to size 8 or 10, they tend to have a C, and upwards of size 16 or 18, they are larger than a C. You can change the cup size when you alter the dress, but be careful because depending on the design of the dress, the amount of seam allowance it has, etc., that alteration can be difficult, expensive or ill-advised.
9. Don't Pay Attention to the Size
That brings me to my next point. Don't even think about the size. Wedding dresses are sized so weird. And every designer sizes differently too. If you're a "street size" 8, you might end up with a size 12 dress, or you might end up with a size 4. I'm not kidding. My sister is a 2-4 and her dress was an 8! Besides them being sized weird, they also order your dress based on your biggest measurement. Say your hips are bigger than your bust, maybe wide for your height. They will order the bigger dress to fit your hips and tell you to alter the top to fit you. That's just how it works. Don't let the numbers get you down.
Have you found any other tips or tricks for dress shopping?! Tell us in the comments!